Can I Do This Alone? Why Surrogates Should Work With An Agency
Embarking on the incredible journey of becoming a surrogate is a huge decision that deserves careful consideration. Right away surrogates face a choice between doing surrogacy “independently” or with an agency. Surrogates, especially first-timers, can greatly benefit from the expertise and support offered by surrogacy agencies (also called surrogate matching programs). Whether you are planning to carry for a family member or close friend, or looking to be matched with other intended parents ready to build their family, the advantages of working with a good agency are undeniable. Here are just some of those reasons why a surrogate should partner with an agency:
1. Expert Guidance
The world of surrogacy is intricate and involves various steps, such as screening, insurance, escrow, legal matters, medical processes, and more! These complexities can be overwhelming to navigate without professional guidance and getting certain decisions wrong could leave a surrogate and her family financially or legally vulnerable. A good agency understands the intricacies of the process and works with experienced professionals attuned to the emotional, legal, and logistical nuances involved. They can answer any questions, address concerns, and provide much-needed emotional support when required. Having a compassionate and knowledgeable expert at hand allows surrogates to focus on their health and well-being while trusting that their surrogacy journey is in capable hands.
2. Screening of Intended Parents
For surrogates looking to match with intended parents, a good agency will vet those matches for the surrogate. At Brownstone, we screen all of our intended parents and make sure each surrogate has the information they need to match confidently. Intended parents must undergo criminal and civil background checks, medical screenings, and a psych consultation. While we are not judging who should be parents, we are making sure that everyone is informed during the matching stage of the process. We believe that surrogates deserve to know who they are helping through this unique and intense journey. And, at Brownstone, the surrogate is the first to receive and consider the profile of a potential match, putting them in the driver’s seat during matching.
3. Mediation in Tricky Situations
Surrogacy involves some of the trickiest subjects to discuss: money, abortion, covid, and other sensitive medical and legal issues. These important conversations can be challenging, even (or especially) when working with family members or friends. Surrogacy agencies act as mediators, facilitating these discussions or handling them for the parties altogether. A good agency will create a safe and neutral environment for all parties involved. Their experience in managing these sensitive matters ensures that difficult conversations are handled respectfully, contributing to smoother communication and stronger relationships.
4. Discounts for Intended Parents
The one main advantage of going “independently” is to save intended parents the cost of an agency fee. But if a prospective surrogate knows a family member or friend who they wish to carry for, many agencies, including Brownstone Surrogacy, will give a discount for intended parents who sign up already matched. This discount may enable a surrogate to assist their loved ones and still receive the support and expert guidance of an agency while also helping to make their dreams of parenthood more attainable!
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Choosing to embark on the selfless journey of being a surrogate is both rewarding and complex. While it is possible to embark on this journey alone, partnering with a surrogacy agency like Brownstone Surrogacy ensures a well-supported experience. Ultimately, by choosing the right agency, surrogates are taking care of themselves while doing something amazing for others.